Have you ever notices the many commonalities between sex and food. Both are nourishing. Both are sensual. Both offer variety. And don’t forget the words used to describe food and sex are often interchangeable!
The interplay of Food Play
This week over in social media (find it here) I’ve been talking about food and sex. Food and sex can be used for pleasure, nourishment, and experimentation. Food play, often refers to sitophilia, is a form of sexual fetishism in which participants are aroused by erotic situations involving food. The phrase can also refer to non-sexual play with food, such as food displays that are decorative or playful, and joy of preparing food. Then there’s the aphrodisiac side of food; foods that purport to increase sexual arousal or pleasure. And if we can believe that a food can increase sexual arousal, then we must also believe that food can decrease sexual arousal. For example, back in Ancient Rome, the Romans believed that lettuce immediately rendered men impotent.
Guidelines for Food Play
If want to incorporate food play into your sex life, here are some basic guidelines to keep it spicy and safe.
Consent
Have consent from your partner before introducing food. Have the conversation far in advance, talking about the pros and cons of the idea. Ask about foods that are unsavory to your partner or that trigger allergies.
Containment
Keep food away from genitalia. The risk of infections, skin irritations or lost food is too great a risk. Plus there are plenty of food safe erogenous zones above the waist. Only exception would be plain ice.
Check it out
Use foods that invite all the senses. This isn’t just about taste. Use foods that have variety of texture, temperature, and taste. Alternate between sweet and spicy, and warm and spicy.
Contact
Use your mouth. Oral sex isn’t just about mouth to genital contact. Be creative with your mouth as you use food in the safe zones. Lick, suck, nibble. And be sure your mouth is empty of food before moving to the genitalia too.
Create a Plan
Be prepared. Have the food items nearby. Use bedsheets or towels that you don’t mind getting dirty. Have clean up supplies available if necessary. Ideally clean up is part of play (see number 4) but if you need a bit more clean up before moving on, have rags, wipes or the like nearby. And don’t forget the usual preparations of lube and condoms, or toys.
Celebrate
Have fun. Sex is about the pleasure, the experience, the fun. Food play doesn’t have to be intimidating. Start small and as the experience draws you in, expand the foods and play that you welcome into the bed.
Bon Appetit and Be Well!