It’s a key phrase in most self help books, blogs, and social media memes. It’s even used during therapy session (I’ve even said it before many times). There are a variety of ways to say it; straightforward, analogous, cutesy, fun. It all boils down to the idea that you come first. I disagree with this.

Don’t get me wrong

Taking care of yourself is a good thing. It’s essential to living a life of wellness, being present with others, achieving goals, contributing to your community, etc. Yet when we proclaim ad nauseam that ‘you can’t pour from an empty cup’ and that ‘take care of you so you can take care of others,’ I believe we lose a piece of what humanity offers. Altruism.

Putting others first

In a fast-paced and self-centered world, it is essential to remember that true happiness lies in putting others before ourselves. It may seem counterintuitive at first, but selflessness has the power to transform our lives and the lives of those around us. By prioritizing the needs and well-being of others, we tap into the infinite potential for personal growth, cultivate meaningful relationships, and contribute to a more harmonious society.
First and foremost, putting others before ourselves allows us to develop genuine connections and forge lasting relationships. When we show kindness, compassion, and empathy towards others, we build trust and create a sense of belonging. By giving our time and attention to the needs of those around us, we strengthen the bonds that tie us together. These bonds, in turn, provide a support system that can uplift us during challenging times and enhance our overall well-being.
Moreover, embracing a selfless mindset enables us to experience personal growth and expand our horizons. When we focus solely on our own desires and aspirations, we limit our potential for growth. By shifting our focus outward, we gain a broader perspective on life. We learn to appreciate diverse experiences and embrace different points of view. By immersing ourselves in the needs and aspirations of others, we open ourselves up to new opportunities, skills, and knowledge that we would otherwise miss.

Ripple Effect

This continuous personal growth enhances our understanding of the world and enriches our lives.
Additionally, placing others before ourselves allows us to make a positive impact on the world around us. Many great social movements and changes have been driven by individuals who put the needs of their communities or causes above their own. By contributing to the well-being of those less fortunate, we actively participate in creating a more equitable and just society. Our actions have the power to inspire others and create a ripple effect of kindness and generosity.
Critics may argue that prioritizing the needs of others will lead to our own neglect, but this perspective fails to understand that selflessness is not self-sacrifice. It is about finding a balance between our own well-being and the needs of others. In fact, when we give freely and unconditionally, we often receive unexpected support and love in return. By fostering a community that values kindness and reciprocity, our own needs are more likely to be met. Indeed this falls under one of the 4 pillars of wellness - spirituality. For when we practice selflessness, contributing altruistically, we experience deeper meaning within ourselves.
In conclusion, embracing a selfless mindset and putting others before ourselves is not only a noble choice, it is also a means to contribute to your total wellness.

Be Well.